Why Do You Want to Deschool? Understanding Why it Matters

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Why do you want to deschool?

Deschooling is one of the most important steps in beginning a homeschooling journey—but it’s not just for beginners. It’s an ongoing process of reflection, healing, and shifting how we think about education.

In last year’s Deschooling Workshop, I asked five homeschool moms the same foundational question:

So why do you want to deschool?

Their answers were as varied and insightful as their families. But what united them was a desire to do homeschool differently—to make it more authentic, aligned, and child-centered.

I recently shared more about this on my podcast, Homeschool Mama Self-Care, in an episode called “Why Do you Want to Deschool? Understanding Why it Matters.” If you’d rather listen, you can find that episode above. But if you’re ready to reflect and reset your homeschool mindset, read on.

If you’re just beginning your deschooling journey—or even if you’ve been homeschooling a while but still feel stuck in a school-at-home mindset—this free Deschool Your Homeschool Checklist will help you take a breath, reflect, and start shifting your perspective. It’s a practical guide to notice what’s no longer serving you and begin building a homeschool life that aligns with your values. Grab it here and take your first intentional step toward confident homeschool freedom.

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What Is Deschooling, Really?

Deschooling is the intentional process of unlearning the beliefs and systems of conventional schooling that we absorbed as students—and often unknowingly bring into our homes when we begin homeschooling.

It’s not just a break from academics (although that’s often part of it). It’s about questioning long-held assumptions:

• What does real learning look like?
• Can a child thrive without grades and tests?
• What if structure isn’t the only way to create progress?
• Who decides what “falling behind” means?

Deschooling invites us to shift from fear-based decisions to values-aligned intentions.

Even as a long-time homeschooler myself, I still find areas where deschooling is needed. When I first brought my kids home—my oldest from second grade and my second from kindergarten—I tried to recreate school at home. It took me months (okay, years!) to unlearn the urgency to “keep up” and start trusting my kids’ natural curiosity and our family’s unique rhythm.

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Five Real Moms, Five Real Deschooling Motivations

Let me tell you about the five mamas I spoke with recently:

• One mom wants to follow her child’s rabbit trails of interest—but still values routine. She’s exploring how to blend freedom and structure without guilt or fear of “getting behind.”
• Another mom hasn’t pulled her kids from school yet, but she’s preparing to homeschool in the fall. She’s already starting to question her own educational assumptions so she doesn’t recreate a stressful school-at-home dynamic.
• A third mom has been unschooling for five years, and yet she still finds that deschooling is a necessary part of her mindset work. It’s not a one-and-done process.
• One mother shared how she pays close attention to her 7-year-old son’s cues—when he’s energized by social time, and also when he’s clearly done with formal lessons for the day. That attunement is part of deschooling too.
• Another mom spoke about recognizing how her own school experiences shaped her initial homeschooling choices—and how she’s learning to trust a new way of learning.

From School-at-Home Stress to Confident Homeschool Freedom

If you’re in the messy middle—wondering if you’re doing enough, or worried you’re not doing it “right”—you’re not alone. And more importantly, there’s a way forward.

🌟 Join me for the upcoming workshop:
“From School-at-Home Stress to Confident Homeschool Freedom: The Deschool Breakthrough Workshop.”
In this live session, we’ll identify the subtle ways school-think might be sabotaging your homeschool joy—and create a vision that actually reflects your values, your kids, and your real life.
➡️ [Click here to save your seat.]

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Use the Journaling Workbook to Go Deeper

Want to explore your own motivations and mindsets in a quiet, thoughtful way?

🖋️ Grab the Deschool Your Homeschool Journaling Workbook—it’s designed to guide you through reflections that will help you understand what you’re releasing and what you’re building. Whether you’re brand-new or years in, this workbook helps you gain clarity, compassion, and confidence.
➡️ Download the free journaling workbook here.

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What Beliefs Are You Ready to Release?

We ended our workshop by digging into some powerful questions:

• What do you believe makes an education “successful”?
• Are you structuring your homeschool around your values—or around what others might think?
• What kind of learning environment do you want for your kids?
• How can you shift from managing their learning… to inspiring it?

These questions are the work of deschooling.

And the beautiful thing is—you don’t have to do this alone. Let’s rewrite the story together. One mindset at a time.

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People also ask:

• Deschooling and Life Purpose: Is there a connection?
• How my story of deschooling brought more freedom & purpose
• Self-Care & Deschooling: Is there a Helpful Connection?
• How to Know if Deschooling is Right for You: 7 Signs you Need to Deschool
• How to Use the Practical Deschool your Homeschool Checklist
• Why Deschooling? To Feel Confident, Certain & Good Enough
• How to practically deschool your homeschool mindset
• Is deschooling a fad or is it here to stay?
• How to Create a Compelling Homeschool Vision Statement: Make This the Best Homeschool Year Yet!
• Get free Deschool Coaching for More Freedom & Individualization
• What do homeschoolers want to deschool from: let’s get specific
• Join the Deschool your Homeschool Challenge
• How to Facilitate Child-Led Learning in your Homeschool

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